A single parent going back to dating may normally encounter jitters like it’s the very first date all over. Here are some tips you can consider in order to ease back to finding your own happiness with a new partner.

1) First of all, you must talk to your children. It’s never a good idea to keep this from them, as kids will eventually find out your seeing someone. If you have older kids, it would be a lot easier to talk to them about it. But the younger ones may have a hard time understanding why you are going out with some guy other than their father. So, talk to them in levels they would understand. Eventually, they will get used to seeing you out with your dates, or boyfriend, for that matter. And welcoming the guy into the family would be easier.

2. Introduce the new person to your kids. So that he or she won’t be treated like a stranger. Have your date pick you up at home or spend some minutes with your kids to get to know them.

3. Listen to what your kids have to say about your date or the fact that you are dating. You don’t necessarily have to agree with what they think of your date, but it will give you something to consider, when deciding to push forward with the relationship.

4. Set a good example to your children, especially if you have kids in the dating age. It’s fun getting to know someone in your life, but you also are someone’s role model, so strike a balance between the two. Never fool aroud in places where you also do not want your kids doing with their dates.

Raising a toddler is tough. But raising two kids (or more) whose ages are so close to each other can drive any parent crazy. You hear most parents say how much their house is a zoo, and you should actually believe that. I have a friend who has kids ranging from 9, 7, 4 and one who just turned a year old, and looking at her juggle through this kids and all their issues is exhausting.

But, there is an upside to this according to the New York Times. Siblings whose age are close to each other grow up really close and bond really well. As kids, they pretty much fight often and have an all-out war. But as adults they way better relationships, they are each other’s best friend. And as far as families go these days, it’s always wonderful to learn that there are still those who keep stronger bonds. Siblings who grew up together have this.

I grew up with a brother who is years younger than I am and our bonding is very different. We hardly have a bonding time, in fact. Which makes me envious of this when I see the relationship of my friends and their siblings.

So, parents with little kids in the house…

As much as you want to pull all of your hair out and you beat yourself with stress trying to referee these siblings when they fight, just learn to appreciate the moment. And learn to appreciate what is there. For there is going to be a huge pay-off later.

A co-parenting situation is the preferred set up for many families. With so many having experienced divorce, finding a good way to work together for the mutual goal, and work with each other for your children is important for your child. That is a fact that most do know, and try to work with even when ‘dealing’ with each other may be hard.

Yet, many are finding that they are having problems with co-parenting.

Parents who limit contacts by their co-parent with the children often have what they believe to be rational reasons. Yet, children suffer when they are deprived of the very important regular contact that they should have with their noncustodial parent.

Research has found that many children of divorce have infrequent contact with their noncustodial parent. Some studies have pointed out that about a third of noncustodial fathers saw their children only once a week. And a similar percentage of noncustodial fathers only communicated with their children by phone or letter once a week. Other surveys have shown that about one in five fathers had not seen their children in the past year.

(Source)

Finding a way to work with each other, even through the difficulties or problems can make a difference for your children. While parents working together is the ideal, if it does prove to harder, finding ways to cope and work (even if it is only yourself working towards the coping).

While it can seem unfair, even if your ex isn’t holding their end of the agreement.

Image by OneInstant via Flickr

While a parent will love their children no matter when they were born (or in what order they were born, for that matter) scientists looking into birth order and what that may mean for children have come across some interesting insights.

It does seem that birth order does play a part in personality in children, and adults. If your child is the middle, the youngest, or even the oldest it can lay a part in how their personality forms and grows.

While the recent developments do make sense, science is quick to point out that there are reasons behind them. While a firstborn may receive more attention at first, there are many factors that do have a hand in both personality and birth order.

Positives: Only-borns are the mega-movers of the world. They are task-orientated; tend to be extremely well organised, highly conscientious and dependable. They are keen on facts, ideas and details and feel extremely comfortable with responsibility.

Negatives: The negative characteristics of only-borns can be tough to handle. They are often unforgiving, very demanding, hate to admit they’re wrong and usually don’t accept criticism well. To others, they seem very sensitive and indeed, their feelings are easily hurt.

Read more: How your birth order shapes your personality

While it does seem more like something that should be more at home next to the astrology readings than a scientific study, there does seem to be legitimate reasons behind birth order and personality.

The study covers everything from only-children (quoted above) to twins, and while it does make sense, what do you think? Does it follow your children, and you expectations? Is your lastborn a comedian, and your first to serious on themselves? Sound off in the comments!

Image by stumayhew via Flickr

When single parents remarry it can be hard on children.  At times, it doesn’t necessarily matter if the child is familiar with the soon to be spouse, it signifies that the end to any hope the child may have had of their parents getting back together is officially at an end. 

While some are lucky in that their children don’t remember their parents as a ‘couple’ many more do, and while there may be some issues when navigating these waters, it can be done.

Understanding where your child may be coming from is important.  While the differences between a child who never knew their parents together and one who had are apparent, the overall feelings involved may be the same.  A parent’s remarriage signifies an end to something that was familiar and comfortable.  The parent/ child relationship will change.  It’s a hard thing to avoid, but reassuring your child that they are loved will help.

There is also a potential for a negative reaction if your child was hoping that both parents would one day reconnect.  Talking to your child and reassuring then that both parents still have more than enough love to give can also help the transition.

While there are still many potential obstacles, overall most problems may be helped with some understanding and talking.  Being open and honest, while still age appropriate may really help out in large amounts.  It may be a difficult transition, but far from impossible.

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